Five tips for western men wanting to date Indonesian women.

 

 

 

Never leave an Indonesian girl unattended in a swimming pool

It is necessary to understand that a number of Indonesian women do not know how to swim. Although Bali is an island the Balinese people tend to avoid swimming in the ocean. Due to tourist influence the culture is changing. But before the arrival of tourists the people of Bali would only enter the ocean if it was unavoidable. Also many of the women that come from other places in Indonesia grow up in rural environments. They did not have swimming pools and the ocean was too great a distance and impossible for them to reach. A number of these women were also raised in a semi strict Muslim culture where modesty is considered very important. They would not get away with strutting around in a bikini back in their home villages.

It is important for men that date Indonesian women to remember this. And it is wise for them to have a go slow approach if they want their lady to join them in the swimming pool or for a dip down the beach. With the right sort of encouragement and support an Indonesian lady will enjoy the water. And she will do her best to learn how to swim. But it may take time and a lot of time frolicking in the shallow end of the pool. Teaching an Indonesian woman the basics of swimming is also a great way to get to know her, and it is certainly a laugh. Just be careful not to let her swim in the deep end alone as I promise you she will sink like a stone if you do.

Don’t get nervous if your Indonesian lady talks to her friends in her own language

I was sitting with a friend who was new to Bali and to dating Indonesian women. And he was having a real problem because the love of his life would chat to her girlfriends in her own language. He could not understand what was being said. And for whatever reason, this always left him thinking that they were talking about him. My friend then told me he was thinking of learning the language so he knew what was going on. Learning the language is a great idea. But it is also important to remember that if an Indonesian lady does not want you to understand what she is saying, then you won’t. She will either switch dialects or she will speak so fast that you won’t have a chance in hell of catching up.

When my friend told me about his problem, I told him that when he had the opportunity he should eavesdrop on a conversation between two women from his own country. And that he should listen for as long as he was able before he became bored. At the risk of sounding sexist, Indonesian women chat about the same things that western women chat about. They chat about their friends and family, shopping, food, and paying the rent. They pretty much chat about any topic that comes up in a normal conversation between women. Although the men in their lives are important they are not the be all and end all of their discussions. Put simply, if you could understand what your Indonesian girlfriend was saying to her friend. Then you probably would not be that interested anyway.

Respect her family and understand her culture

This is probably the most important one of the five. An Indonesian woman will have two great loves in her life and you will never supersede them. Your Indonesian partner will also take the time to teach you what your role is with her family and her culture. And if you are open to learning you will understand that they are reasonable and simple. You may be expected to offer some type of financial support to her family if it is needed, but if she is honest this will only be when it is needed. It is also wise to put in place boundaries, but if you are also honest about what you can afford. Then what she asks for will never be beyond your means. You will also be expected to give her the freedom to practice her traditions and at certain times to be available to join her on these occasions. Basically you will be asked to meet the family and to join in some celebrations. This is what a woman from your own country would expect within a relationship.  And I would suggest that you go along and enjoy it, you might just have fun.

 If you do these things your Indonesian girlfriend she will reward you with everything a relationship with an Indonesian woman has to offer. Indonesian women can be very caring, loving, supporting and fun to be around. The rewards of dating an Indonesian woman will far out way the small sacrifices you may be asked to make.

Watch your phone because she will be watching it

If you get the chance watch an Indonesian woman use her phone. You will then notice that her fingers swipe the screen so fast that they become a blur. You should also have no doubt that this woman is reading and digesting information faster than any super computer. Now imagine this same woman with your phone in her hands and you may get my point.  Indonesian women view an unattended phone as an invitation, they will pick it up and they will look. Never leave your phone where she can get her hands on it if you have something to hide. They are also able to remember every call and text made from the phone in a matter of seconds.  

Don’t eat her food

You may be sitting at a restaurant with your Indonesian girlfriend and she may offer you a taste of her food. And then you may think it will hurt her feelings or be unmanly if you refuse to take a bite. Now take a look in your girlfriend’s eyes and ask yourself see if you can see a glint that you haven’t noticed before. That glint is female Indonesian cruelty and she would like nothing more than to watch your head explode. Remember your Indonesian girlfriend has been eating hot food since the day she was born. And have no doubt that the mother’s milk she was weaned on was laced with the hottest chillies available in Indonesia. It doesn’t matter how good you are at eating spicy food you cannot compete with her taste buds. It is also a well-known fact that you can strip paint with an Indonesian women’s food. The food may look tasty but it is lethal and it will kill you. The best thing to do is to politely refuse the taste and then hope she doesn’t offer again.

Hold onto Your Husbands (excerpt from Bali Raw 2)

Beautiful Indonesia

Hold Onto Your Husbands

Married couples are retiring in Bali at an ever increasing rate. This would seem to make perfect sense. A couple, who has worked hard all their lives and built up a small nest egg, can retire to Bali and live out their golden years luxuriously and relatively cheaply. The people are friendly, the island is beautiful and the weather is perfect. But more importantly a reasonable lifestyle on the island can be achieved for as little as US $ 3000 a month. Bali could seem like a dream place to spend one's declining years. But unfortunately this may not be as simple as it may sound.

Retiring to a place like Bali can place a heavy burden on a marriage. There will be the expected pressures. The couple will have to adjust to different foods, different ways of paying bills, different driving habits and different laws for example. But then there may also be unexpected emotional strains applied to the relationship. And one of these pressures may be jealousy.

Western women considering retirement in Bali should think about the level of temptation that will be placed before their husbands on a regular basis. Bali is full of beautiful women, foreign and local alike. Any man living in on the island will be confronted regularly by beautiful young girls. He will see them wearing next to nothing and sitting astride motorbikes. He will notice them parading along the beach topless, or in bikinis that barely cover their lithe and lascivious bodies. And he will encounter them drinking in bars or dancing seductively in nightclubs. And these women are just the tourists. For a man, residing in Bali can be like living at the Playboy Mansion.

The beautiful and seductive young tourists are not the only problem. Then there are the stunning Indonesian girls who are ready with a smile and always willing to sit and chat. These women are not shy to approach an unaccompanied man. And although not all of them are planning some sort of sinister seduction, a number of these women have nothing but seduction on their minds. They are more than willing to steal a husband from unsuspecting Western women. To this type of woman, a rich Western man is the prize they have been seeking most of their lives. They couldn’t care less about his marriage status. They will weigh up what he has to offer and if he is deemed suitable, they will start making their take-over plans.

The female population of Indonesia, over the age of fifteen, is close to eighty million. If a woman retires to Bali with her husband and she is foolish enough to allow him to roam its streets alone, then she could be seen to be committing a form of marriage suicide. A woman contemplating this would be very wise to learn from Indonesian ladies. An Indonesian women involved in a relationship knows about her competition. She has to. She was once a competitor in this most ruthless of games. Regardless of his excuses she will never let he partner out of her sight. The risk of losing him is too high. She will keep constant tabs on her man and she will shadow him at any given opportunity.

An Indonesian woman will do anything in her power to keep other women away. A perfect example of this is the innocuous love bite or hickey. An Indonesian woman will randomly mark the neck of any man she is intimate with. She will not do this because she is overpoweringly caught up in the act of making love. She will do this as a warning sign for other women to keep away. For her the love bite is a dog pissing on a tree symbol of ownership. It is a message to her competitors that they had better stay away.

©Malcolm Scott

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