Happy ending massages Bali part 2 (How to get one)

Going through the Bali Raw Blog stats, I couldn’t help but notice that there seems to be a great deal of interest in the Happy Ending Massage post. In the post I give a few tips on where to get one. But I don’t really follow through on how to get one. So here goes.

Happy ending massages are quite common in Bali and wider Indonesia. And there is little stigma attached to the service. The practice is almost an integral part of massage in Bali. And although it is generally not advertised on billboards or signs, a number of touts bluntly make reference to the service. It is important to remember that Indonesians are very forthright when it comes to discussions that involve sex. And if a person is seeking a full service massage they should not be afraid to ask. The query will not be frowned upon. And at worst it will be met with a few giggles and directions as to where happy ending massages can be found.

This could be considered reasonably true for heterosexual men, gay men, and ladies. But there are always exceptions. So please remember to be respectful when asking. I should also point out that there are fewer stigmas applied where heterosexual men are concerned.

In the larger massage parlours this query should not be posed at the front counter. A number of these establishments do not like to admit openly that their employees preform full service massages. This is more to do with reasons of law than anything else. The best possible time to suggest a full service massage is when you are alone with your masseuse and before the massage begins. It is important to keep in mind. That most women and men working in Bali massage parlours are asked the question routinely, they will not be offended.

For anyone unable to pose this question directly, a simple query as to whether to be completely naked for the massage will sometimes suffice. This generally sends the correct message and supplies the wanted answer. For anyone unable to ask any questions, it is sometimes beneficial to build a rapport with the masseuse. If they do preform the service then they are far more likely to suggest it if they feel comfortable.

For anyone seeking a full service massage in Bali, please remember that the people in the massage industry work very hard and get paid little. It is always important to be polite and to tip well. Even if they do not supply the massage service you are seeking.

A tip for heterosexual men: If there is a goldfish bowl set up in the lobby of the establishment or a folder on the front desk displaying pictures of the massage ladies. Then it is a good sign that full service massages are performed. 

©Malcolm Scott

For more on Happy Endings:  www.fb.com/baliraw

Romance Travel (excerpt from Bali Raw 2)

 

Romance Travel

Men have a history of visiting Bali for sex. And it is true that Bali’s sex industry was probably built by men for men. But there is a growing trend for women to become involved in Bali’s sex industry.

Foreign women have been traveling to Bali with the intention of indulging in sexual activity with local men for a long time. The pioneers of this type of excursion were predominantly Japanese women. Bali originally became popular with wealthy Japanese because of the massage industry. Japanese ladies would invite young Indonesian men to their hotel rooms so they could receive intimate and sensual massages. The exchange of cash for a deeper, more satisfying service grew from these humble beginnings.

In the past, the pursuit of Indonesian men by wealthy Japanese ladies was rarely spoken about or reported. It was almost a taboo subject and certainly not something to boast over. Japanese women would travel to the island in pairs. And maybe they would compare notes, but what happened in Bali stayed in Bali. Now it is common knowledge in Japan that Bali is the home of sex for wealthy women. It has become so commonplace it is almost a cliché. If a woman from Japan should mention that she is traveling to Bali for a holiday she will almost certainly face sly looks, smiles or innuendo.

Western women seemed largely unaware of the situation sometime back. Adventurous older women sometimes brought men back to their rooms in the guise of receiving a massage. But as with the Japanese it was mostly a well contained secret that sex for hire was involved. All that changed with the release of documentary The Kuta Cowboys by Singaporean director Amit Virman. After the release of the film, western women came to realize that there was little stigma attached to being seen in the company of an Indonesian man.

Western woman are now far more comfortable dating Indonesian men. And they are quite happy to come to Bali in search of a two week seduction by a young and handsome man of Indonesian origin. These women have even given this type of adventure the pleasant sounding name of Romance Travel. And Romance Travel is becoming very big business in Bali.

The age group and M.O. involved in these relationships has also shifted. Where once older woman took young Indonesian men back to their rooms for a night of paid for passion. Younger women are now dating these men for longer periods. These short romantic interludes often involve the exchange of money or gifts. The woman is also expected to pick up the bill when it comes to food and drinks. In return they receive a tour guide with benefits, a handsome young man who is more than eager to spoil them, pamper them and make them feel beautiful.

It could be said that women who travel to Bali with the sole intention of paying Indonesian men for sex. And women that overindulge their Indonesian partners with gifts or money in return for emotional and sexual activity are doing the same thing - they are employing the services of male prostitutes.

Women who involve themselves in this type of relationship often argue this point. They say that the young man they are dating is either a holiday romance or a potential future partner. And that money and gifts are only supplied due to the difficult financial position of their companion.

Receiving money or gifts for sex is definitely prostitution. But should the buying and selling of companionship receive such a harsh label? Sex seems to be only part of the equation in these circumstances. Women who date Indonesian men often state that they also receive emotional support and friendship from these relationships.

Perhaps these women are only attempting to create the illusion. That someone in the world cares about them. Could this really be such a bad thing? 

Indonesian men often date foreign women in Bali and it would be a generalisation to say that all these relationships are based on an exchange of cash or gifts. So it should be clarified that a number of Indonesian men involved these type of relationships are not gigolos. And the women involved are not always paying for the company.

©Malcolm Scott

For more on the Kuta Cowboys www.fb.com/baliraw