Happy ending massages Bali part 2 (How to get one)

Going through the Bali Raw Blog stats, I couldn’t help but notice that there seems to be a great deal of interest in the Happy Ending Massage post. In the post I give a few tips on where to get one. But I don’t really follow through on how to get one. So here goes.

Happy ending massages are quite common in Bali and wider Indonesia. And there is little stigma attached to the service. The practice is almost an integral part of massage in Bali. And although it is generally not advertised on billboards or signs, a number of touts bluntly make reference to the service. It is important to remember that Indonesians are very forthright when it comes to discussions that involve sex. And if a person is seeking a full service massage they should not be afraid to ask. The query will not be frowned upon. And at worst it will be met with a few giggles and directions as to where happy ending massages can be found.

This could be considered reasonably true for heterosexual men, gay men, and ladies. But there are always exceptions. So please remember to be respectful when asking. I should also point out that there are fewer stigmas applied where heterosexual men are concerned.

In the larger massage parlours this query should not be posed at the front counter. A number of these establishments do not like to admit openly that their employees preform full service massages. This is more to do with reasons of law than anything else. The best possible time to suggest a full service massage is when you are alone with your masseuse and before the massage begins. It is important to keep in mind. That most women and men working in Bali massage parlours are asked the question routinely, they will not be offended.

For anyone unable to pose this question directly, a simple query as to whether to be completely naked for the massage will sometimes suffice. This generally sends the correct message and supplies the wanted answer. For anyone unable to ask any questions, it is sometimes beneficial to build a rapport with the masseuse. If they do preform the service then they are far more likely to suggest it if they feel comfortable.

For anyone seeking a full service massage in Bali, please remember that the people in the massage industry work very hard and get paid little. It is always important to be polite and to tip well. Even if they do not supply the massage service you are seeking.

A tip for heterosexual men: If there is a goldfish bowl set up in the lobby of the establishment or a folder on the front desk displaying pictures of the massage ladies. Then it is a good sign that full service massages are performed. 

©Malcolm Scott

For more on Happy Endings:  www.fb.com/baliraw

Five tips for staying safe in Bali nightclubs

 

Being that it is high season in Bali, I thought it would be timely to mention a few safety tips for Bali nightclubs. Some of these have been mentioned before, but since you can never be too careful I thought it couldn’t hurt.

Use Your Hotel Room safe.

Bali nightclubs contain their share of pickpockets and opportune thieves. It is never wise to carry your credit cards or too much cash when drinking at Bali clubs.  

Bali is relatively cheap so you don’t need a huge amount of money on any given night out. It is also small and there is plenty of transport. Take what you think you may spend in cash. And if you run out of money hire a motorbike or taxi and retrieve more from your hotel.  It is a far better option than waking up in the morning with no wallet or purse. And your credit cards in a thieves possession.

Know Who You Are Taking Home

There are plenty of prostitutes trawling the Bali clubs. And Bali has a very high H.I.V. infection rate. Be sure that the lady/man you are taking home is what you think they are.

Indonesians tend to be upfront when asking personal questions. So don’t be afraid to ask your intended if they are working or not. If they are working and you intend to go ahead with the transaction. Be sure to wear a condom purchased in your own country. Condoms obtained in Bali tend to break easily.

Do Not Become Involved In An Altercation

Any foreign tourist that gets involved in a physical exchange with an Indonesian will come off second best. This cannot be said enough. They will either be set upon by other Indonesians. Or they will find themselves arrested. And they will face paying out large sums of money to solve the problem.

Remember Indonesians stick together whether it is in a nightclub or in a police station. It is always better to walk away from any confrontation.

Do Not Drink The Rocket Fuel 

There have been tourists deaths attributed to drinking rocket-fuels in Bali. A number of these drinks are methanol based.  This is a dangerous chemical that can cause blindness, coma and death if consumed in large amounts. If you are going to drink rocket-fuel, please drink it in moderation. Or better yet stick to beer or name brand spirits.

Do Not Take An Expensive Phone To A Nightclub

Expensive phones are prized by Bali thieves because they are so easy to sell. There is any number of second hand phone shops and they do not run checks for stolen property. Leave an expensive phone on a bar or table for a few seconds and you can be sure it will disappear. Put your expensive phone in the hotel safe and buy a disposable cheap one. There are plenty of shops where these can be purchased.  

©Malcolm Scott

Learn more about methanol based drinks:   www.fb.com/baliraw

Bali Sex

Bali Sex

Plush Hotel

Book a plush hotel for the evening and make good use of the pool.

For this type of romantic interlude you will have to do some research. Find a nice hotel that is a little bit off the main drag. And before checking in be sure you ask to see the swimming pool. What you are looking for is an isolated area with no rooms overlooking the pool. And no security posts close to the pool zone. Lush vegetation around the swimming area is also a bonus.  

Most hotels will tell you that the pool area is out of bounds after a certain time, so don’t ask. Then it’s case of setting your alarm or staying out to the early hours. When the coast is clear take your friend your towel and a few drinks down to the pool area. A bit of sneaking around may be involved in this endeavour. And it is always nice to remember that kids use these pools so be tidy and clean up afterwards.

Bali is warm at night so getting cold won’t be a problem. Just make sure other tourists and the hotel security guards have gone to sleep before you try this. And remember to do whatever you do, quietly.

Note: This type of scheme generally works best in Bali’s low season.

Hollywood Beach

There are a few isolated beaches around Bali you just need to know where to look. One I heard about was referred to as Hollywood Beach. A private or rented scooter is needed to get to this beach and it can be found off the road to Uluwatu. It’s not sign posted so you may need to spend some time going down the gravel tracks that run off this road.

If you find Hollywood Beach you will come to a small car park and steep steps leading down a massive hill to get to the beach. But it is isolated. And there are a few places to hide and get lonely with a friend. The climb back up the hill is a killer so remember to take plenty of water.

There are also still a few isolated beaches between Nusa Dua and Uluwatu. Again a scooter and an adventurous spirit are needed.

Note: This type of scheme generally works better in Bali’s low season.

 

The Islands off Bali

For those looking to get away so they can get it on the Islands of Bali are perfect. One of my favourites is Nusa Ceningan. Small wooden cliff top villas can be rented on this island and they are perfect for romance. Ceningan also has a small private beach that rarely receives visitors. Again a scooter and an adventurous spirit are needed for those traveling to this island.

Note: This type of scheme generally works better in Bali’s low season.

Cheap Hotel

For the all-round seedy experience, men with a sordid spirit might want to visit one of the smaller and older hotels in Sanur. Some of these places will even fetch you a willing participant. Just talk to the staff and ask if they would be willing to help with your plight before checking in. Then describe the type of company you are interested in. The male security guard at the gate will generally be helpful with this endeavour.

One place a couple of friends told me about allowed afternoon drinks around the pool. They said they arrived and spoke to the hotel porter. Then they relaxed had a beer and went for a swim. Magically the porter turned up with a few compliant companions a few minutes later. They had a wonderful time entertaining their guests by the pool. And they were comfortable in the knowledge that they had a hotel room waiting for them when the party was over.  

Note: This type of scheme generally works better in Bali’s low season.

©Malcolm Scott